I never never thought I would be 39 weeks pregnant, still updating you on my pregnancy, and still not holding my baby girl in my arms! Have you ever heard the saying, “Be careful what you wish for!”. Well that saying is definitely for me right now, I’ve prayed so many times and so has my family for a healthy full term baby. It definitely looks like I’m going to get that! I had my cerclage taken out exactly 1 week ago and even the DR told me, go walk around, and you’ll probably go into labor in the next couple days. My 39 week DR appointment is now tomorrow and he swore that I wouldn’t even make it to that point. My mom even took all last week off because we thought for sure as soon as the cerclage got taken out, it would cause me to dilate and baby girl would be on her way. Well we couldn’t be more wrong! Don’t get me wrong, I am so happy and grateful to have carried full term but at the same time I’m so anxious and ready to meet her. Every day I wake up all I can think of is, “OMG I’m still pregnant!!”. Every little pain or cramp gets me excited, all I can think of is “Oooh this is it”! But no nothing! I can’t call my husband, I can’t call my mom, because every time I call anybody they think I’m calling to let them know I’m in labor. And then don’t get me started with the phone calls and text messages everyday asking me if I’m in labor. That’s almost more frustrating then anything else with this pregnancy, I’m getting so tired of people asking me how I’m feeling. I just want to be like don’t worry I will let you know when I go into labor, if anything all this asking is just making things worse and giving me more anxiety. I’m trying so hard to not stress about still being pregnant, I know that when baby girl decides to make her grand entrance it will be perfect and it will all work out! She will come on her own time when she’s nice and ready.
Lets get back to having my cerclage removed….holy moly it hurt like a b*tch!!! I had read other woman’s blogs who were also high risk and some woman said it didn’t hurt while others did say it was painful. Well I was in the group that thought it was painful! It probably didn’t help that the DR couldn’t find the 2nd tie and so he had to reinsert the speculum and “search” around. When you are 9 months pregnant you are already so sore in that area and so to have the DR messing around up there is just pure torture. I had my husband go with me for moral support and boy am I glad that I did! I was squeezing my husbands hand as tears rolled down my cheeks. There was just so much pressure and it felt like the worlds longest pap smear. When the DR was finally done I had a little bit of bleeding but mainly felt so exhausted, the DR told me to go walk around to get things “started” but I literally was so tired and needed to go lay down. I swear that little procedure took so much out of me physically. It’s funny because I was reading some peoples stories and they talked about how they started dilating hours after the procedure and went into labor that night, so in my mind I was thinking that was going to be me too! I felt like I was going to stand up and right away start dilating from all the weight haha! Well that definitely didn’t happen! My husband even called me later that day asking if I went for a walk and if I felt like labor was starting. A big fat NOPE!! I just had a really bad headache and wanted to sleep! That night my mom even made sure to have both her cell phone and house phone next to her bed just in case I called them! Well this little girl has a mind of her own and is waiting for us all to be caught off guard!
That weekend we took the kiddos on the Polar Express train ride. The train is about 45 minutes away from my house which makes it about an 1hr and a 1/2 from the hospital. I definitely was nervous driving all the way but I felt fine before we left. If I had the slightest bit of cramping I would have stayed home or had someone else take the kiddos. The other couples we were going with joked that I was going to go into labor on the train ride so the whole time I was like please don’t let my water break or anything happen! We had never done the polar express ride before so we had no idea what exactly to expect, all I know is that it’s pretty pricey. For my family of 4 to go it was around $200! As soon as we saw Santa though it clearly became worth the money! Seeing the kids faces as we pulled up to Santa’s workshop and then getting to see Santa as he made his rounds on the train was so magical. Seeing Christmas through your child’s eye truly is the best thing in the world! Especially Kaiden my little 2 year old, he was beyond excited, there’s no Santa fear with him at all. A couple days prior we had even told him he needs to tell Santa what he wants for Christmas so as soon as he saw Santa he was sure to tell him, “I want a firetruck”! He kept repeating himself and it was the cutest thing ever, reminded us of Ralphie from “A Christmas Story”. We will definitely be going again when baby girl is about the same age as Kaiden was this time. It’s something you have to at least experience once.
On Dec 19th we celebrated Christmas with my husbands family. Never did I think baby girl would not be here to celebrate this holiday with us. My due date per my 1st ultrasound is tomorrow, I definitely didn’t think I would be still pregnant on my due date! I didn’t even have anything planned on what I was going to wear because I didn’t think I was going to have to dress a ginormous belly bump! Months ago I even bought baby girl her Christmas dress and based the other 2 kiddos outfits off of her dress and now she’s not even here to wear it. That’s what I get for being so prepared! I kept the tags and receipt so it makes me just want to return it. Overall, Christmas with the Johnsons was very nice. My mother in law bought baby girl a snow globe that said 2015 on it, we joked that what if she wasn’t even born until 2016!